10 years ago I woke up.
I wasn’t handed a letter of congratulation or saw any flashes of light.
I did, however, have a beautiful moment that brought me to tears. That moment was the beginning of my journey into experiencing life, as it is.
“Enlightenment” is not as you think it is. It is amazing and yet the simplest occurance.
I am no priest, guru or master. I am you.
How Enlightenment Actually Feels Like
Most go through stages rather than wake up fully. It took me nearly a decade before I found any sort of equilibrium.
When I was 18 I was casually reading some stuff online a mental test staring back at me.
It was fairly simple:
“Are you your next thought? Are you thinking or is just thinking just occurring?”
A fairly simple test it was and yet it was enough to blow me open. I pondered for a few seconds and it felt like a “click” inside the mind had gone off. Initially, I didn’t feel anything and moved on.
The next few days I started to feel a shift in my perception, it almost felt like I had started losing my mind a bit.
Then, boom, it hit me.
It felt like I had found the secret to life itself. I was incredible, to say the least.(And still is!)
I felt strange and yet, familiar. I had returned the source, from which I had never left. I had realized that “I” was not separate and there was connection with every atom in the universe.
I never even took a second to think about my “spiritual path” or “releasing the ego”. To tell you the truth, I was more interested in playing video games at the time, but that’s the thing right?
Life doesn’t care if you are ready or not, if you’re brave enough to face your true nature you will also awaken.
Life then started to feel as a movie was being watched. There was no observer any longer, no “I” to attach to.
It was simply life experiencing itself as it is. That’s what enlightenment is. Seeing through the illusion of control and returning to a perspective of observation occurring, with no observer in sight.
My Spiritual Enlightenment Experience
Remove any preconceived notions about what “enlightenment” is. Language is not capable of describing true nature as it is. Language is a parallel line next to enlightenment, infinitely never crossing paths.
After the first taste of spiritual enlightenment, all that joy, happiness, and bliss started to fall away.
Enlightenment put up a mirror for me to see. Reflected was all of my internal struggles, doubts and thought patterns that were not removed when I had woken up. Work is still required unless you are the lucky few that have an instanteous, full, enlightenment.
I dropped out of college and sunk deeper into depression for what felt like an eternity. Peace was still within, and yet I couldn’t escape from the blanket of heavy emotions that were following my every move.
My enlightenment was rather destructive as my ego hadn’t entirely left me during the initial awakening. It took years of meditation and introspection simply to start letting go of my previous identity structures.
If we just lived without asking any questions about our lives, how would that look like?
How Does an Enlightened Person Live?
I’ve been awake for 10 years. It’s difficult to remember how it was before. It did truly feel as if I woke from a dream.
Can you recall every instance of every dream you’ve once had?
I don’t really think about it that often, how long it’s been or what it was like before.
What I do know now is that the mind can be so, so quiet. Living happens on its own. I do not think about what I will do during the day, the day lives through me.
Imagine your mind is like a forest. Inside that forest, there are many different plants, animals, insects that move around and create noise. Those are your thoughts.
What happens in between all the life moving about?
It’s just silence. You come to understand that you don’t need to be thinking all the time and that thinking is rather a tool that is utilized throughout our waking period. For most people it’s the other way around, constant thinking and never any silence.
While it is silent I still some days feel “sad”. It is a bit of a misunderstanding though because “sad” for me is the same as “happy”. It’s all the same, it’s all on one spectrum. You can’t have one without the other. Yin and Yang.
I go with the flow. I understand to not ask questions. I let life LIVE through ME. I don’t live life myself. There isn’t anyone here inside of the mind, it’s space watching life being lived.
I tend to not worry about things and it drives most people nuts. It’s actually quite comical if you’ve ever been in a relationship with a control freak and you’re the polar opposite. It’ll drive them mad at how carefree you can be.
That’s really it, you know. Living a normal life and trying to help people. Chop wood, carry water. It’s the same before and it’s the same after, only with a different perspective.
My awakening has given me tools that I must give back to the world and that’s why I’m writing this blog, to finally help people.
What is your real purpose in life? You’re reading this, so I’m sure you’re interested in spirituality. It might be ready to start your spiritual journey if you haven’t already.