Non-attachment is not a new idea or fad. It’s the natural state of the human mind. It is not the act of detaching, it is simply being free of attachments.
Every human has the ability to realize non-attachment. The irony is that you won’t gain anything at all, but only realize what is already here, now.
Below you’ll find out everything you need to know about non-attachment.
If you’re ready, let’s begin.
What is Non Attachment?
Non-attachment is not a state that can be gained, achieved, or practiced. Non-attachment is the natural state of consciousness. It’s the ultimate letting go of attachment to self, thoughts, feelings, and addictions.
The illusion of self causes attachment. When you believe the “I” inside the mind controls life, duality begins. This thought of ownership, thinking that “you” are in control, is what causes attachment.
Attachment causes suffering. The “I” needs to be right, it wants to find “happiness”. It causes arguments, pain, and depression. Attachment is unable to let things be as they are, otherwise, the “I” would no longer be necessary.
Non-attachment is what’s left when the illusion is seen through. When the illusion breaks, the true nature of reality is realized. Non-attachment cannot be gained, it’s the realization of what is already before you.
Why Non Attachment is Important
When you’re living through attachments, it feels like a void that can’t ever be filled. You’re always going to be searching for the next material object to find solace in, a fleeting feeling to chase or an addiction to get lost in.
Realizing non-attachment lets you break free from the suffering that you’ve been conditioned to experience from a young age. Instead of feeling off balance and seeking, you return to a state of equanimity. When all is centered, there is nothing left to attach to. This is the purpose of spirituality.
Even though non-attachment can bring feelings of bliss, the wisdom is in understanding beyond the mind that this too shall pass. It shows you that you don’t need to seek or gain to feel peace.
True, real happiness is here and now. You don’t need to travel anywhere or do any-thing. Non-attachment is how life was meant to be lived.
Ways to Practice Non Attachment
Before you begin on your journey to realizing non-attachment, I would like to warn you of a common trap. You’ll find that you’ll try to believe in a “concept of non-attachment” rather than see it for what it is. Non-attachment is already here, the only thing that needs to be done is to see it.
It might not entirely make sense now, but you’ll get the hang of it soon enough. Keep an open mind and always be curious about what’s behind closed doors. You’ll find that these methods aren’t groundbreaking or unique. It’s the simple things that work, and have worked for thousands of years.
The first step to realizing non-attachment is learning how to meditate. If you’re already meditating, that’s great. If you’ve been meaning to learn, NOW IS YOUR CHANCE.
Out of all ways I’ve tried to center myself, nothing has been as insightful as meditation. You need to unlearn your habitual logical thinking patterns. You need to start living in the present moment and that begins with meditation.
Non-attachment is not a philosophical idea that can be confirmed through thinking. It must be seen through beyond the logical mind, and this takes practice. It isn’t always 100% necessary, but for most, it will be the first step.
To learn how to meditate to begin priming the mind, you can check out how to meditate here.
2. Catch Yourself in Attachment
Becoming aware of how your mind works is a process. You’ll find that you get stuck between attachment and non-attachment. That shouldn’t discourage you. It’s an invitation to take a look at what’s going on behind the curtains.
If you find yourself frustrated that you can’t let a repetitive thought go or escape a feeling, that’s your chance to find truth. You want this to happen to you, it’s how you develop the instinct to guide you through life.
You’ll find that you can’t control your feelings and thoughts because they aren’t you. The more you sit with these uncomfortable feelings of attachment, the easier it is to see that they are automatic processes. All of this happens with or without an “I” in the picture.
Let yourself get attached and then bring awareness to what’s causing it. Your aim isn’t to detach from these thoughts or feelings, but rather investigate them until they are let go naturally. You can’t control when it will happen, but you can put awareness in the proper place.
3. Ask Questions
Uncovering years of conditioning isn’t an overnight shift. Alongside meditation, you’re going to want to ask questions.
These aren’t typical questions that have answers. The aim here is to continuously ask these questions until the truth is seen.
Here are some examples:
- Who am I?
- What is my purpose in life?
- What is God?
- What happens after death?
The philosophical part of the mind will continue to try to form an answer. That’s the trick here. You throw these questions out into the atmosphere and see what returns. Try it once you get the hang of meditating regularly.
This method is called “self-inquiry” and has been practiced for decades. When you ask these questions, ask them with purpose, but have a sense of curiosity.
Your mind will scramble trying to put together a logical answer. Continue asking, until the only response you get is silence. That’s what you’re looking for, the deepest insights are made during moments of listening.
Let the natural flow of life come to you rather than trying to bring yourself to it. You’ll get the hang of it with practice.
What Does Love Without Attachment Mean?
Non-attachment is a paradox. The logical mind cannot comprehend the wisdom of the infinite. Love is all around us, even when attachment isn’t present.
Loving without attachment is unconditional love. It means that you accept not just a person, but everything around you without any argument. Being able to live without any internal conflicts is what true freedom is.
If the person you love walked up to you and told you that they were moving on, you wouldn’t reason with them. You would accept it as fact and let them go because your love is infinite. You do not attach to an idea of a person or relationship, you let all things be as they are.
You are willing to let go of even the deepest of love at a moment’s notice. That’s how you love without attachment.
Let Go Without Trying to Let Go
The more you seek non-attachment, the further it eludes you. Your aim is to unlearn what you’ve known your entire life.
It’s not something you’ll learn in a day or a week. But it isn’t something that you need to study diligently for years to realize, either. That’s the trick in all of this.
Let it come to you, don’t force it. You’ll be ready when you’re ready. The second you stop seeking is the moment you’ll shatter through the illusion.
The greatest gift is already upon you.