How To Find a Spiritual Mentor

Finding a guru or a master in any practice can be difficult. A beginner may not understand what to look for and may fall for a snake oil salesman who is only after their money. You want to enable yourself for success when finding a spiritual mentor as there are plenty of fake mentors out there peddling shallow methods looking for a quick buck. How exactly do you find a spiritual mentor?

A real spiritual mentor is not interested in selling you a product or course. The best spiritual mentors are the ones that point you to yourself, they truly understand that in spirituality we ourselves are the best teachers.

Avoid Promises

If anyone promises you that they have all the answers and that you should listen to everything they say, take off running.

Spirituality is about looking within and finding the answers for ourselves – if anyone is trying to convince you to follow them or pay them then avoid them at all cost.

The issue for newcomers is that they want the answers and they want them now.

Many people are suffering and are looking for relief. This is when exploiting the needy occurs. I see this over and over again and it saddens me fairly deeply at how people can be so revolting and take advantage of others for personal gain.

On your journey on how to find a spiritual mentor, it may take a while to truly find someone you enjoy listening to. It took me years and years to find someone who I can just listen to without any fear of being misguided. Trust your gut, your instinct is all you have in your decision making of who will be your spiritual mentor.

It may even seem that in some moments you don’t need a spiritual mentor and that is perfectly fine. The only thing that you need to do is listen to yourself and follow that instinct. Along your spiritual path you will be your own leader. Allow yourself to not be convinced by anyone what is true and not true within your own experience.

Your spiritual mentor may even cross paths with you when you are ready, there is no rush.

How to Find a Spiritual Mentor

The great thing about technology is that spiritual mentors are no longer just hidden on a mountain in India.

Spiritual mentors are all over the internet. Youtube, podcasts, blogging, there is an immense amount of information to sort through.

With so many different options to choose from, it’s understandable that you may be left in confusion. Listen to as many teachers as you would like and find what works for you.

Having a wide variety of information is a blessing and a curse. It’s difficult to know who is living through truth and who is living through lies. Go with your gut when in doubt.

You may outgrow your mentors over time. It is said that you must let go of your teachers in order to become a master. In spirituality, there is no “teaching”, it’s all pointing back to yourself.

Spiritual mentors should give you teachings that are so simple they can be understood by a child. Find and compare all sources until you’ve come to a conclusion on which person you would enjoy listening to.

Test what your mentor is telling you. If you cannot find truth in reality, then it’s time to move on from them.

You Yourself Are The Mentor

You don’t need to find a mentor. It isn’t inherently necessary on a spiritual journey.

In my early stages of my spiritual development I really looked up to this guy, let’s call him Charles.

Charles was incredible, it felt like he knew exactly what I was seeing at all times and he was delightful to listen to. It felt as if he could solve any of my problems and I could confide in him entirely.

We worked together for years and years until we had a disagreement.

You see, Charles was just like everyone else. Charles was incredibly gifted with charm. I saw him as a mentor but towards the end of our time together it came to me that we were equal, he wasn’t above me as he would like me to believe.

I wanted to look up to someone, for someone to hold my hand. A spiritual mentor isn’t there to hold your hand. You learn to guide yourself.

Charles taught me a lot of things that I found to be completely false. This experience made me realize that I was capable of guiding myself from here on out.

That moment was a moment of growth. Realizing that the most insightful truth is from within.

You don’t need anyone to show you the way. You can show yourself.

Be aware of the pitfalls along a spiritual journey. Many “gurus” are enticing and yet have no depth.

Finding Your Spiritual Mentor

The master will show himself once the student is ready.

Do not try to force a mentor to appear out of thin air. That’s how you end up in confusion.

While it may be confusing at first, following these tips will help you learn how to find a spiritual mentor:

  • Avoid anyone who promises you a secret solution
  • Don’t pay more than you can afford
  • Watch out for cult behavior
  • Remember that you yourself are your own best mentor
  • Take in multiple sources of information and compare

Don’t be afraid if you might have listened to someone who isn’t so sharp. Finding a spiritual mentor is part of the journey. I believe that when your mentor is truly ready they will show themselves to you. Try not to force anything if possible.

If you are looking for a recommendation, Adyashanti is my personal favorite.

Mentors don’t have to be met in person. Mentors can be someone you just enjoy listening to online and take in their information with an open heart.

Enjoy the journey!

Looking to start your spiritual journey? Check here.

About Roy Cohen

Hi there! I'm the founder of Claiming Clarity. My passion in life is helping people live better. If you'd like to learn more, check out the about page.

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