Being honest with yourself can be difficult. If you haven’t practiced brutal self-honesty, the way forward may get messy. You will have to confront yourself on a deep level in order to grow. You will have to begin by laying out what you have been avoiding internally and face yourself.
Honesty leads to an authentic life. People are attracted to authenticity. Your relationships will grow alongside your honesty. Living in a web of lies requires more effort than simply being honest.
If you can’t be honest with yourself, how can you be honest with anyone else?
The Brutal Truth
Honesty is required for personal growth.
Avoiding oneself results in years of frustration. The cold hard truth is that brutal honesty is required before you can begin improving your life.
If you aren’t anything but brutally honest, the lies build up over time. Lying to yourself makes it reasonable to lie to others. The resulting web of lies you’ve constructed takes effort to sustain.
Avoiding honesty to avoid confrontation with ourselves and others is a fallacy. One lie requires an exponential amount of energy to uphold. Honesty requires no effort. The truth is appreciated and respected.
People appreciate honesty whether they realize it or not. Subconsciously humans are attracted to honesty. Not just honesty in conversation, but in the manner you carry yourself.
The person who is completely honest with themselves is free from internal conflict. They aren’t avoiding themselves to hide, they have looked within and found their deepest meanings in life.
Honest people have an aura around them. People have a habit of opening up to you the more honest you are. Feeling trust is imperative for the human condition.
One lie is enough to ruin a valuable relationship. One lie to yourself and you will end up living an inauthentic life.
Lying is conflict. Honesty is flow.
Honest living isn’t effortless, it requires practice and integrity. Having to face yourself time and time again with brutal honesty is one of the most burdensome tasks in life.
The work is worthwhile. Living an authentic life is worthwhile. Being trusted is worthwhile.
Being Honest with Yourself
It’s time to stop running. It’s time to face reality.
Are you where you want to be right now? Is there a conflict you are avoiding?
The faster you run the harder you fall. Our lies have a habit of catching up with us. Dishonesty can only be maintained for so long before it all comes crumbling down.
Write down what you have you been avoiding. Stare at that piece of paper. Work through every single one.
If you’re experiencing anguish, only do it for as long as you can bear. There is no point in torturing yourself, that isn’t the point of this exercise.
Your gut will tell you the truth. The deeper being inside of you that requires honesty. Your soul wants the truth.
You don’t want to look back in 20 years and regret not having faced yourself sooner. I’ve found that I can only be off my path for so long before I end up getting shaken back into place.
I lived a lie for a few years. I knew my job was harming me mentally and physically. The money was good but I didn’t mind.
Years passed and I became more miserable over time. I burned out, hard. I couldn’t face myself in the mirror anymore.
I knew deep down inside I was avoiding the truth for so long. I had to finally face myself after all of these years.
And you know what? The mental pain was some of the most extreme I’ve ever felt.
I grew, though. I’m back on my course. I know now more than I did then.
I can’t lie to myself. When my gut is telling me to go left, I go left. I don’t beat around the bush, it’s called a gut feeling for a reason.
You have to be honest with yourself otherwise you’ll be left wondering what could have been.
You are strong enough to face yourself.
Living an authentic life requires hard work but the rewards are immense.
You feel free when you walk outside. You don’t care what others think about you, you know yourself so damn well that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.
You have that aura around you that people sense. People can’t help but smile when they talk to you. They will tell you that they trust you even though they barely know you.
This stems from being honest with yourself. You have to figure out what it is you are being inauthentic about and take action.
- Breaking up with a significant other that you know isn’t going to work out
- Changing a job that you hate
- Working on your image by working out
- Cutting off toxic friends/family
- Chasing after your passion
Yes, the first step is difficult. It’s one that you must take. If you aren’t with yourself, how can you be honest with anyone else?
You know deep down inside what you want out of life. Stop ignoring those deep pangs that are calling you to wake up.
It only requires action. Action that you take today.
Being Honest with Others
Being honest with others is a bit tricky.
When I was younger I had a bad habit of saying what I felt was the “truth” but not understanding social dynamics well enough to where I was grating. Adulthood taught me that not every interaction should be approached with brutal honesty. Sugar-coating is acceptable in certain situations.
When it comes to friends, family, and significant others, honesty reduces conflict.
It is brave to tell someone how you feel. You may have been hurt by what they said or by an action they did. If you aren’t honest, this leads to passive-aggressiveness leaving both parties frustrated.
We all make mistakes and can be unaware of how our actions impacted someone else. It’s your job to tell them because no one else will.
Don’t be “brutally” honest, be honest with a little bit of sugar on top. Some may get infuriated that you are expressing yourself. Guess what? You don’t need those people in your life.
The more you practice this type of honesty the easier your social interactions become. Not only that, people will respect you for speaking up.
Don’t be afraid of confrontation. This is especially vital in romantic relationships. Being upfront with your expectations and feelings will lead to both parties finding resolution.
The other side of this is harboring negative feelings without any relief. This can turn into anxiety and depression, all because you weren’t honest!
Your friends and family will appreciate the honesty. Frightening at first, but once you realize that being honest is the best option you won’t live any other way.
Honesty breeds authenticity. You will grow through self-honesty and your peers will respect you for the ability to do so. Living honestly is the first step in becoming a better human. Taking the first step can be rough but over time the results more than make up for it.
Every minute that passes is another minute where honesty can be expressed. Your deepest desires want to be met and they want honesty. Living authentically is exponentially less difficult than maintaining a facade. Take it one day at a time, it won’t be an automatic switch.
Put in the effort. It’s worth it.